What to do when men find you intimidating + how to be more approachable to men

A lot of single women I coach say that men find them intimidating. They’re smart, successful and fully capable of supporting themselves. They have every other area of their lives sorted except for their relationships.
What should you do if men find you intimidating? I share three things you can do in this video:

Check out of work mode

If you are successful in your career I’m certain there will be times where you need to be assertive, where you’ll need to take charge. But it’s important that Dating is different. You don’t always have to take charge. You can’t run your relationship like you do your team at work. I had a 1:1 coaching client in hr . At work her job was to listen and solve other ppls problems. And so in her relationships she’d always try To solve her man’s problems. When often he just wanted her to listen. So, try to differentiate between you at work and you in a relationship.

Let people do things for you

It’s 2018. Women are independent. We don’t really need a man to live a rich life but we want one. One mistake I often see in my date coaching practice is what women don’t let their man do things for him. But doing everything for yourself- the guy doesn’t feel like he can offer value in a relationship. And it doesn’t make him feel good about it. Let him contribute to the relationship. Maybe you make more than he does, let him pick up the tab. Flat tire? Call and ask for help. Sometimes it’s just nice having things done for you.

Embrace your vulnerability

If you want to connect with someone fast, you need to embrace your vulnerability. What I mean is, you need to show them who you are. Maybe it’s sharing your insecurities or your fears. Maybe it’s as little as telling your date/man that you get nervous on dates. Or maybe it’s that you’re afraid your next presentation at work will flop. Everyone is so obsessed with showing the best version of themselves that it’s refreshing to show them the behind the scenes and not the highlight reel.
If you struggle to get past the first few dates or feel like you’re going around in circles with your relationships, check out Goodbye Casual dating or my Attraction Mindset Freebie.


Iona is a Wellness Coach specialising in relationships and dating. She works with single women to write their own love stories.