Why Finding a Relationship is Like Finding a Rental Property in Sydney

finding a home is like dating

Due to a series of events, my boyfriend and I had 3 weeks to find a rental home in Sydney recently. If you lived here, you’d know how extremely competitive it is to find property. Last week we went to an inspection for a 2 bedroom loft apartment – 30 people lined up to see it. I thank my lucky stars we eventually found a house we love but it wasn’t without a few near meltdowns.

You can have all the money in your bank account and be diligent with your paperwork but sometimes finding a dream home is all about timing and fate (+ a few other things) – just like finding a relationship. The roller coaster of emotions in finding a home is much like those in looking for the right relationship. Here is why finding a relationship is like finding a rental property in Sydney.


Just like a good man, good homes are hard to come by. And so when you’ve find a good one, you do everything you can to get it. You put in the effort and tame your inner crazy but just like a dream rental property, you have no clue who else has set their eyes on the same property. This unsettling feeling can leave you anxious and insecure, especially if you’re single in Sydney, where guys seem to flee the second you mention any arrangement with the resemblance of a relationship (not all but most). You’re constantly wondering if you’ve made enough of a good impression, second guess your every encounter and check you phone every 5 seconds to see if they’ve called. I’ve never been so insecure than when I was waiting for that call from our real estate agent.


I think dating apps serve a purpose (I met C.A through Happn) but I also think it’s sped up the way we date. You see someone you like, swipe right in your pjs and the next minute you’re chatting to them and planning your first date. Miswipe and you’ve missed your chance. Just like sending through that rental application ASAP, you have to be just as quick when you’re dating, otherwise the man/woman of your dreams could go to another swiper.


The right guy won’t judge you on what you do for work or how much money you earn each year but a lot of wrong guys will. This is especially true if you’re online dating where all potential matches have to go by are your profile pictures and a 2-3 line bio. It may seem shallow but in truth, those are 2 things people judge you by when you meet them in person. Next time you meet someone new, I challenge you to refrain from asking what they do for work. Often we are judge by our occupation first and then everything else later. I admit I’ve been guilty of reading occupations in dating profiles to determine which way to swipe. It’s the same in getting a rental property – it’s all about how you look on paper. The agents want to know if your lifestyle is compatible with the cost of the home, whether you’d be able to sustain a future together, just like you would when sizing up a potential partner.


Sometimes things fall through. You may not know it at the time but you eventually figure out why. We didn’t get the 2 bed loft apartment I loved. It had big windows, high ceilings, lots of natural light for my kind of photography and all the space we could ask for. I fell in love with it the second I stepped into the picturesque interiors. I willed it to be mine and stressed about it all day. In the end, the apartment went to another couple. I have no idea why. And though I was upset at the time, the very next day, a new property popped up in my inbox. It was $100 cheaper per week, a brand new house and it had a front yard – it was even more perfect than the dream apartment we thought we’d lost. Like finding a relationship, it can be terribly frustrating to date and never have things eventuate. That guy you thought would be a keeper stops calling or you fall into a pattern of really bad dates can leave you feeling jaded. But sometimes you have to trust that everything happens for a reason. One seemingly failed attempt is a stepping stone to finding your love.


Been bankrupt? Missed a rent cheque? Cheated on your partner? Well all those things can leave you with a bad rep and it matters whether you are trying to land a new home or relationship.

There’s no real way to hide the past so if you currently have a clean background check on all counts, keep it that way. If you’ve had a bad history, be honest, acknowledge what went wrong and find a lesson in it. Every experience (good or bad) teaches you a lesson.

We move into the new home in a few weeks but it wasn’t without some perseverance. So if you’re looking for a rental property or that relationship you’ve finally been waiting for, keep faith. Both can feel like a chore and disappoint you in ways you never thought possible but when you finally find it, you’d probably do it all over again. Good luck!

Oh if you ARE looking for a rental property in Sydney, here’s what I learned.

First impressions count. Bring your business cards and dress smart

Have all your paper work ready upon inspection. This gives you a serious competitive advantage

Go to inspections during the week. Saturday inspections are highly competitive but if you can arrange to go to a viewing during the day, you’ll have a better chance at landing the property you want.

Photo Credit: Vita Vilcina via Unsplash


Iona is a Wellness Coach specialising in relationships and dating. She works with single women to write their own love stories.



  1. Reply

    Christina Dmith


    Hey there,

    Just a quick inquiry whether it would be possible to get a mention for one of my clients (an Australian dating site) on your blog – i.e. do you provide a contextual marketing service?

    I look forward to hearing your thoughts on how we can work together!


    Christina Smith

    • Reply



      Hi Christina,

      Thanks for your comment, I just left you a note.