“Who you are is determined by how you leave”. I read this quote on a career website the other day and couldn’t help but think how relevant it was to relationships. No matter how perfect you were as a partner – leave on a bad note and you’ll always be known as the bitch who broke his heart. Never mind the months you spent investing in a relationship that (in hindsight) was doomed to fail anyway, how you leave your partner is sometimes more important than the relationship itself because it’s how you’ll always be remembered. So take it from someone who learned the hard way and walk gingerly on the path to singlesville.
“Sarah is now single” – Take a Facebook Break
If you want to end things on a good note, it’s best to breakup with your partner BEFORE changing your Facebook status. It sounds so obvious but you’d be surprised by how many people do this and earn themselves the title of cold heart bitch by mutual friends and family. Everyone forgets eventually but resist the urge to announce this publicly and, at least let him know first, de-friend and then you can trot your way to singlesville.
Hold the Text
SMS seems to be the cop out for every scenario. Want to chuck a sickie? SMS the boss instead of calling. Want to cancel plans? Text to soften or avoid the blow. Want to break up with you partner? SMS is the way to go for cowards who can’t be bothered to call or arrange a meeting. This was the person you shared a meal and a laugh with. If you made all that effort to dress up for dates and such, at least have the decency to let him know it’s over.
The Code of Silence
If you have nothing nice to say, don’t say anything at all right? This does not apply to break ups. There’s nothing worse than leaving a partner leaving them wondering what went wrong? Do them a favor, tell them exactly why you want to leave and give them some closure so they can move on as soon as you can.
Bank some relationship karma and treat breakups as you would in a relationship – with honesty and respect. You can do it.
Written by Iona Y